Yesterday and today I did a lot of thinking, especially about the current state of our world and the economy. Regardless of how everything may seem at the moment, our country is far from alright. As many of you may know, we’re more than most likely going to be entering a depression. Sometimes I think it’s almost inevitable. I feel so sad for our country because everything will be chaos (as if it isn’t already). People will be losing their jobs left and right. Hell, that seems to have already started. Everything will be terrible. I’m convinced the government just does not give a shit about it’s people.

It all brings me to the conclusion that I’m very satisfied with my current state of mind. That being said, I have rarely ever taken anything for granted. I have learned to appreciate the simpler things in life and I’m definitely not a materialistic person, because they come and go. With the world being the way that it is, and how it will become, there isn’t a better way for me to be. Although my pregnancy is a tough one, I’m still pretty much healthy and I thank the Lord for blessing me with good health, a beautiful family (even if it’s small) and the knowledge to understand that these simple things are enough to get me through each and everyday. I have been a victim of many things in life and have still remained the strong person that I am today. What more could I ask for? Sure, I have times when I’m downright angry and/or upset but everyone does. I go through things and I learn from my mistakes. I fall, only to get back up, try again or move on. Whatever the case is, I’m happy about who I am, how I was raised and who I’m going to be in years to come. In my opinion, that’s enough to get through any national disaster.

I’m always going through a lot of things it seems. Over the years, I’ve been through many things that have changed my attitude and outlook on life. Some people can’t understand that sometimes when you go through things, you need time to get yourself together and deal with whatever it is that you have to deal with. This year has been proven to be one of the worst years in terms of the people I call my friends and associates. This pregnancy was the highlight of my year and with that being said, I had to focus on myself and keeping healthy. It proved to be quite a task. There were people in my life who couldn’t understand that I was going through a life change. Whether or not I was already a mother, there was a new baby coming into the picture and that was the main focus.

People had trouble adjusting to my Cancerian ways. Whenever my life changes significantly, I tend to crawl back into my crabby shell, where I can work on myself and begin to make the necessary changes in my life. It’s not that I was being antisocial or anything of that nature but I tend to deal with things better by myself. Pride has nothing to do with this and people thought I had too much pride in accepting their helping hands. I simply do better on my own.

Besides the fact that I wouldn’t accept these extended offerings, people had trouble adjusting to the fact that I wasn’t able to give them the attention that they desired. Their selfish ways is what set my anger ablaze and I began cutting people out of my life. I never wanted to go through what I was going through with people adding that extra stress onto things. I am not obligated to give anyone that special attention they want, especially when I have things going on in my life that I need to handle. Cutting people off proved to be just what I needed because as of now, I am content with the friends and associates that I have, who are understanding and supportive.

Now that I have made the necessary changes in the people I choose to be in my life, I can continue to work on my personal life in peace and not having to worry about who’s going to come to me with whiny behavior like I’m their mother. Everyone deserves a chance to work on themselves, by themselves, if that’s how they desire to do things. I happen to be one of those people and I hope that people have learned a very valuable lesson about being selfish. I hated having to keep explaining myself and my situations over and over again. It was repetitive and very annoying to say the least. How many times should I have to repeat myself? I shouldn’t have to, and that’s the bottom line.

As you can all see, I have up a new theme. I’ve went Pink For October. Those of you who have been visiting for some time know that I lost my mother to Breast Cancer in February of 2004. It started out as breast cancer and eventually spread to other parts of her body. I wish for more women and young ladies to become aware of how serious breast cancer can be. You can refer to my post last year on Breast Cancer Awareness by clicking here.

I haven’t made too many changes to the site but I do plan on making quite a few more changes. I had to import all of my posts back to wordpress so if any registered users received countless email notifications, I’m sorry. I hadn’t realized it was sending emails until someone informed me of it. I disabled notification of posts for all users so it won’t happen again in the future.

Not much has been happening with me lately. I’ve been MIA for the most part because I have been extremely exhausted and trying to catch up on sleep when I can. Most recently, my son was admitted into the hospital for a very bad asthma attack. Needless to say, I was more than terrified this time around because his heart rate was elevated and he actually had to stay in the hospital. I spent that time with him in the hospital and was relieved when he got discharged. He is now at home feeling a lot better! I have one more month of pregnancy left. I’m going to jump for joy when that time finally arrives. My pregnancy has not been easy in the least bit but I’m proud of myself for hanging in there.